Pounding the Matriarchy 🔨

A newsletter on how to deal with hospital nurse feminist bitches.

Smash the matriarchy? YES WE CAN 

What’s up man,

In the recent "Dr. Fatty said she could die" newsletter (banned by Aweber, coming back soon to TDL) I promised you one more story from hospital hell.

To recap: before I impregnated Allyssa, I was well aware of how retarded the American medical system is in the context of pregnancy, birth, and pediatrics.

This view came from my own personal interest in the subjects, watching documentaries, studying the work of 21 Convention speakers like Dr. Doug McGuff, and my own personal research over the years.

Even so, without a baby on the way until late last year, there wasn't exactly a fire under my ass to make this area of life a focal point of interest. Obviously when my first child was on the way, this provided the fire I needed to take my understanding a lot more seriously.

Because I knew that my beliefs were about to go from theory to practice immediately, and in an ongoing basis as the months rolled by.

All that said, I still underestimated how retarded the people I would have to deal with would be. And my expectations were very low going in.

With few allies along the way, I had to deal with and in some cases fire a lot of mid-iq bozos, quacks, and chimps.

MDs, DOs, a variety of nurses, and one social worker I woke up to screaming at my fiancée just hours after she finished a 51 hour labor pushing my daughter out.

The social worker incident was by far the most serious, because these people can very quickly escalate to state power abuse and similar degrees of fuckery. 

There is a new Netflix documentary out now called "Take Care of Maya" that you should watch, exploring this subject from a real life incident in Florida, resulting in the suicide of the mother and major lawsuits.

As for today's story, it's not as crazy as waking up to a fat social worker screaming at my family, demanding I leave the room, but still worthwhile to explore for aspiring alpha male patriarchs.

For the birth my daughter we were interested in a home birth - and did hire a mid-wife temporarily for this purpose.

In the end that didn't work out, we found a doctor we liked late in the pregnancy, and opted for a low intervention hospital birth at the 3rd largest hospital in the United States.

That doesn't mean they would make it easy for it to be low intervention, but at least they were ostensibly willing to play ball.

By comparison most hospitals have this sort of insane sales-funnel system where they want to stick your woman with as many needles and drugs as possible. This is known as over-intervention and this is normal for the majority of hospitals in the US.

Because most doctors are no more intelligent than the manager of your local Walmart, they are all super prone to intervention bias. They lack the self-awareness and IQ to rise above it. 

When you mix this with an insane insurance/lawfare/liability system, the end result is maximizing the number of interventions done "for best practice".

In reality this is very stupid, dangerous, and counter-productive. 

For example, women in labor today are routinely offered intravenous fentanyl. 

You know that drug everyone is freaking out about that can easily kill a grown man? The drug so strong that police are afraid of getting anywhere near it? The drug that killed my brother in law yesterday?

This is routinely injected into women today, and yes, it reaches the baby.

They did offer it to Allyssa at one point early on to which they got a big fat "No". Like nah bro, I don't want my woman and baby doped up on fucking fentanyl during one of the most traumatic events of their lives. 

An epidural injection to the spine is a much bigger pain management decision though, something both Allyssa and I were opposed to for different reasons.

As her patient advocate and "healthcare surrogate" (Florida's equivalent for a medical power of attorney) my main concern was the danger in general for dicking around with her spine. Obviously this is not risk-free, and one wrong move can have serious consequences for your spine.

A secondary concern was doing an epidural too early in the labor progression, separate from doing one at all. Too early in my view risked slowing down the contractions, which could then lead to the intervention cascade from hell, requiring drugs like Pitocin to counter the effects.

This "cascade" sets up a never ending yo-yo effect that often leads to C-section surgeries.

There is also a limited window for the hospital to even offer the epidural. You can't just wait until 20 minutes before the baby pops out, tap out for pain, and stick a needle in a screaming pregnant woman ready to burst.

About 35 hours in to Allyssa's labor, a full day and a half of painful contractions that were getting even more intense, we finally opted for an epidural.

This was so far in to her labor that I thought it would be fine with regard to my concerns for it slowing anything down. Her body was already in ultra-fight mode with hormones raging. 

Imagine trying to shit a watermelon out for 36 hours straight.

The CRNA (Certified Registered Nurse Anesthetist) available by this point was not our first choice. Our first choice from the day before had 20+ years of experience sticking needles in people's spines, this chick had like 7.

That's not bad, but it's not 20+. For something this delicate you want the person most qualified.

Even so we met her, she answered all our questions, and seemed acceptable for the job. At this point she was polite and professional. A little cold maybe compared to the regular nurses, but nothing that threw a red flag.

I tell her that we want to do the epidural in about 2 hours so that Allyssa has time to a) eat some food, b) use the bathroom, and c) continue walking laps around the delivery floor together with me.

Sometimes we would walk together for 30-45 minutes straight. The doctors strongly encourage this to move the labor along, something I completely agreed with.

The hospital didn't offer a walking epidural though. So once it's done, the patient isn't moving out of bed anymore. Your legs aren't even supposed to work from that point forward. Which for Allyssa ended up being another 15+ hours.

This special CRNA nurse reluctantly agreed. She seemed annoyed but not angry. She leaves. I think great, we'll see her in about 2 hours. Now Allyssa has time to do all this other shit that's important.

Little did I know how this was about to go down.

A short time later, our regular nurse (who we liked) and one of Allyssa's two doctors come in the room. Not the doctor we love, but this woman is okay and reasonable to deal with.

Doctor and nurse start explaining to me, standing over Allyssa who is still having seriously painful contractions, that we have to do the epidural ASAP.

They have this sob story about the CRNA lady having to go into an emergency C-section surgery soon, and it could take up to 2 hours.

This story sounded strange to me because I knew that C-sections didn't normally take that long. (I would soon look up on my phone that they average at about 45 minutes).

They were nice enough, but kept pushing this story. Now the surgeon was old and slow and this could take a really long time.

This is when red flag alarms started going off in my head. This just reeked of bullshit.

Why would they be talking shit about an older, experienced surgeon they work with? Makes no sense, and I know there is no medical rush for an epidural at this point.

I finally tell them "Hey this is cool, like I told the CRNA we want to wait about 2 hours, so this is perfect. We have all this other stuff to do. Thanks."

This was not the answer they were expecting. I could tell they were frustrated but not angry. They walked out like puppies with their tails between their legs.

Allyssa and I discuss how weird this was after they leave, just didn't make sense. Oh well who cares right?

Wrong.

Without even knocking the CRNA barges back into the room all of 5 minutes later, with our regular nurse trailing her. I could tell immediately they were not getting along (cat fight!) and our regular nurse looked upset. 

Regular nurse is looking at me completely quiet, and I'm like oh man here we go...

CRNA starts explaining a lot more aggressively than the doctor and regular nurse previously had all the same shit.

Slow doctor. Super old. Now the surgery is for twins.

And now this magical emergency C-section could "take up to 3 hours".

I'm thinking wow, sounds like a world record for slow as fuck C-section.

The story is way too detailed at this point. It's obvious by the tone that the CRNA was puppeting this whole little shit show and she was annoyed that both doctor and nurse couldn't change my decision or get Allyssa to override it.

I stay calm, explain our decision again, and make clear that we're happy to wait 3 hours if necessary. We wanted to wait 2 hours anyway, so this is not a big deal.

I think my nonchalant tone drove her over the edge. It was obvious to me this woman was used to bossing men around, and getting her way with patients.

Bullying and pressuring patients into medical decisions is actually the norm in these settings as I've discussed previously. Men and fathers are supposed to sit on the sidelines, nod politely, and pretend they are doing something by sitting around with their thumb up their ass.

"The boss" aka the woman calls all the shots anyway. Betas obey like slaves. 

The fact that Allyssa trusts me completely, that we have a "traditional relationship", that she submits to my authority explicitly, openly, and in public is anathema to feminist boss queens like this CRNA.

A man like me calling the shots on medical consent decisions is a giant wrench in their daily life at work. Like does not compute, why isn't this man obeying????

CRNA starts yelling at me, right over Allyssa who is in the middle of a contraction, regular nurse goes eyes-wide like "wow this bitch is crazy, don't you see this is a pure blooded apex alpha male?!?"

I stare at this CRNA as she's yelling at me, wondering how miserable she is at home with some fat beta dork.

Don't remember everything she said yelling but I do remember her threatening to not do the epidural at all if we didn't do it right away. Between this threat and the yelling it was obvious this relationship was toast, fuck this crazy lady.

By the time she's done I'm pretty pissed. Still keep my cool, last thing I need is to get us kicked out of this hospital. Me cursing or screaming back would definitely risk that for no benefit per their building conduct policies.

I drop a line I had already printed up before walking in the building

"NO MEANS NO. We're not doing it now. You need to LEAVE."

Eyes go wide now on the CRNA, you could almost see the steam coming out of her ears.

"No means no" is something I had printed 15 copies of before even getting to the hospital. Check it out below.

Now this newsletter is not legal advice, and I have no idea if this document carries any legal weight in Florida. Nor was it intended to.

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